Reasons why I love Mondays, There are almost to many to list. Since everyones facebook status states the obvious "its hot" "i'm hot" I will start there. Yes its hot, yes we live in southern california, yes its officially fire season, complaining about it will not make it less hot, but I will still "like it" if you say it. Yes I was hot today, yes I thought about ditching school, and stripping down, and skinny dipping in Alaska, yes I sat in a trail of ants, yes my shoe broke, yes I sat in a non air contitioned room with 20+ people of which I'm guessing 6 don't believe in deodorant, all of that aside when did it become "ok" to wear half a shirt and tiny jean shorts out in public? The whole I don't brush my hair, and don;t believe in clothes is not acceptable. The only time its acceptable is if you are A.) by yourself where absolutely no one can see you, or B.) a supermodel, otherwise no. The whole phrase less is more, is a lie, sometimes being over dressed is better than being underdressed. Guys are doing it to, which is disturbing for me. Being that your shorts are shorter than mine, and I can see your mipples (male nipples) through the thing that used to be a shirt, because it has a hint of material left in the upper middle area, clearly the only part that survived the war against the scissors. Fyi the over exxaggerated arm holes that extend from shoulder to hip.......not cool, on anyone.
I would like to meet whoever is in charge of the its actually 106 degrees but it feels like 98, I want to meet the feeler. Ask him or her just 1 question. "are you here right now? oh your not so how the hell do you know it feels like 98? hmmm.....I'll tell you what it feels like, it feels like I'm at the effing sun, sweating every ounce of sympathy I have for your and your "it feels like" out! Another thing, its hot I'm single, I am not below making a trip to the fire station (or stations based on the feedback) and handing out cold drinks, clearly the "fireboys" as I like to call them in very a high pitched tone from the safety of my air conditioned windows up car, are going to need to stay hydrated so they can be on their A game.
I want to know if there is a proper way to eat a burrito? Occasionally I will find myself staring down the 9 lbs beast, known as a double chicken burrito, and of course the thing is bigger than any bunny I have ever seen and I would like to pass a law of instead of burrito, food baby.....I think its a logical change. I usually try the "double hander" which is a hand on each side of the beast, and then about 6 bites in one side is clearly way taller than the other so I gotta even things out, which usually leads to utter spillage. So then I try the "claw" where I stretch one hand as big as it will go and the other hand becomes my "scoop" scooping up all the goodness I am spilling. Then the tortilla usually gives way and you have a "blow out" and I always know when the "blow out" is about to happen, but I always lie to myself and just "one more bite", but no the one more bite is just enough pressure to cause the "floor to give out" if you will. Next I try the "pizza method" where I eat it like a pizza, and last but not least the fork, good ol' manners.
This could be a PSA, a FYI a whatever......it needs to be addressed. I'm talking about people who need to have thoughts and not words. Now this was brought to my attention a few months ago, the whole having thoughts and not words. It simply means think before you speak. I repeat THINK BEFORE YOU SPEAK! I am so done hearing irrelevant stories that have nothing to do with, what is being discussed. For instance "the afterbirth looks like lasagna" thank you so much for that mental image. Not only do I want to get pregnant right now, convert to being Pegan, so I can see if the afterbirth in fact tastes like lasagna, but why the hell, would you say that? Now I don't only ever want to marry into an Italian family so I can follow through with my avoidance of Italian food all together, but I also am afraid that you are going to taint my other favorite foods, and I think you need a better filter. I am in 2 Psychology classes, and have heard my fair share of weirdness. Psychology just makes it more readily available for those who abuse it. When we discuss a topic, and it never seams to fail, there is always that token kid who knows someones dads, brothers, friends, sisters, cousins friend who indeed used to use drugs. usually followed by the "oh uhhh but I didn't uhhh know them, uhhh but I knew of them so uhhh" It's like really? Thank you for that life changing story, are you finished? Because in my book your done. That contributed NOTHING to this discussion we are talking about Italian food up here and your drug induced statement, because now I assume you are on drugs, based on the nonsense you just added to the room is unnecessary.
A type and run :)
Type and run :)
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